The Book Of Hate #6

Monday, 18th September, 2017.

11.36

I’ve parcelled my parcels. I’ve dropped them at the post office. I’ve received an assessment interview for Louis to finally be given a school place.  I’ve lowered the action on my Jim Dandy.

All in all, a productive morning. I’ve even had my bloody mary!

13.40

Last night, I succumbed to a strange longing I’ve had. It was to own a Gtech AirRam vacuum cleaner. I know, I know! Anyway, it’s arrived. Ive just put it together and I’m charging the battery.

I don’t know why but it’s exciting.?

17.17

I have now used the gtech. I like it. It makes vacuuming fun. Well, as fun as it can be. 

21.27

Army cadets pick up time. The trials of being a parent. Tomorrow is house bidding day and I’m hoping there will be something to bid on. Not that it means I have any chance of getting it but, at least, I’ll feel like I’m moving on. 

Christ, this is dragging out. It would be great to have my own place by Christmas. That’s probably asking to much though.

Tuesday, 19th September, 2017.

14.13

Another day. I put a guitar up on EBay. Jeff, as I call him. I only own female guitars. Thus, the sale. Louis had an interview with the local authority school bloke. Long story, short. We are getting somewhere. It won’t be long and he will be in school. 

14.47

Ok. I had to go to the pub. 

Ahhh. The pub. We couldn’t stay long as I’d ordered a load of food for delivery from Tesco. Still,…

19.44

Watching tv (some swedish thing called Black Lake. It’s got a “Shining” feel about it). Then I watched Mindhorn. Pretty funny.

Wednesday, 20th September, 2017.

13.22

No work again but back on it tomorrow, through until Saturday. It’ll cover my week so I’m not bothered. I’m just trying to get on with arty projects to keep myself from rotting. 

19.17

Another day almost over. Louis’ at cadets, so I’ll have to go and collect him at nine thirty. I feel ill. It’s probably the drinking and “third day” come down. I’ll get over it. Thank god for work. I think I’m going stir crazy. 

Thursday, 21st September, 2017.

06.59

Slammed train and threats of delays. Just what you want, as soon as you get on the train for the first time in a week. 

My brain is an awful place to be early in the morning. Rammed packed full of imminent crashing and regret. Fear. My toughest adversary. The only bonus is it’s supposed to be a short day. I’m already planning to shower and go straight back to bed.

07.41


Dreams. How long can they last? I’ve been dreaming so long. The 18th December 2015. That’s when life began again. That’s got to be around 500 days( I’m not working it out!). So much has happened and so little. 

“Don’t let it bring you down, it’s only castles burning, find someone who’s turning, and you will come around.” – Neil Young.

12.10

13.15

As usual, I’m sitting on the Reading train, awaiting departure. This is the first time since last Thursday, I haven’t been drunk by now. As I said, work is a good safety valve. Instead of going back to bed(I knew I wouldn’t), I’m going to have my quarterly wet shave. 

It’s about time, I think?!

18.58

That’s better. It’s amazing what a bit of looking after yours3lf can do. 

I feel about 12. Ok, mayb3 not but my head definitely feels lighter.?

Friday, 22nd September, 2017.

07.04

I feel a little more upbeat, this morning, than yesterday. I managed the 06:39. Even with coffee.

Right! Wake up song, wake up song!

11.31

Cruisin’ through the day. I don’t know if it will be a long one, as we have to have some work left for tomorrow. The downside was having McDonald’s. I feel sick now.

It’s been an odd one in town today. I just can’t place my finger on why? I think it might just be than I’m an awful, retched refugee of my own backwardness. Hmm? It’s a question, I suppose. One minute I feel in perfect control of everything. The next minute, I fear someone will discover, I’m deluding myself and beat me to death with my own shoes………….


Ha! That just proves the point. I just tried to go up the down escalator. This is a definite “M&S cow beer for the trip home” situation.

15.03

Aahh…. The calm of the train. Leta see what pictures I’ve taken today:

00.54

I’ve got to go to sleep. Too much lust and feeling. Quiet brain.

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