The Book Of Hate #4

Monday, 28th August, 2017.

Bank Holiday.

13.04

Where did all the days go since last Tuesday? Only god can tell. I think I just gave up on life for a bit. It all seemed tedious. Monotonous. Fruitless. 

Today, I am, desperately, trying to be constructive. I’ve managed to get up, put some shorts on, print Louis’ school work for tomorrow and drink coffee. Yet, the day is slipping away.

I did put up these boxes on Carter’s wall yesterday. I suppose that’s quite productive.

Tuesday, 29th August, 2017.

13.21

The blew the the rest of yesterday. Got drunk, played a little guitar. It was hot though. That’s my excuse. 

I feel shit now. I got up and cleaned the stove. The frills of life. 

It’s another beautiful day, which is good. I’ve had my bloody mary so I’m starting to feel more alive. 

Wednesday, 30th August, 2017.

12.39

The third day I’ve started my daily blogging and given up. Nothing is happening. I’m brain dead. After my bloody mary yesterday, I did nothing but drink water. That’s a lie actually. I went out and bought a toaster.

I’ve got to get out of this mindset. I’m going to make a ragoo and contemplate.

Thursday, 31st August, 2017.

17.44

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck you all.

I don’t mean that. Just feeling bad. Hurting. No reason. It’s a condition. I’m sorry Carter. I’m just sorry. You have to endure……..

FUCK.

Friday, 1st September, 2017.

07.45

The lies of summer. I’m glad it’s almost over. I’m back on the grind. Bakerloo worm. The boy is going visit his mum this weekend. I wouldn’t mind seeing the other boy though. It’s been months. The beginning of May, I think. I must try harder. If only I could get Louis sorted and in school…..

Glum thoughts. Put a game face on and suck it up.

Tuesday, 5th September, 2017.

07.12

Days are just slipping away. That’s what it feels like. Nothing to be proud of, nothing to regret. I bought a living room bar which I collected Saturday afternoon. 

A little project to keep me out of trouble. 

Louis came back Sunday. He didn’t have a lot to say about seeing his mum and brother. I didn’t push it. Yesterday, I didn’t work so I went to my parents and started sorting out all the music equipment that needs to be sold. 

And now I’m on a crowded train, off to Chancery Lane. So, the long and short is, I have been proactive but drifting like a ghost.

08.06

It’s time to document a little tube action. This is something I particularly enjoy.

Reading the text.

Mildly Amused.

Forever Waiting.

Tube Life.

18.55

Just as an aside. Why are apple products so shit. Yeah, they can do certain things very well. Like graphic design, video editing and music but why can’t they just do basic stuff like connect to printers, unzip stuff properly, etc, etc…….Fuck!

Wednesday, 6th September, 2017

10.41

It turns out it was the person who sent the zip files that fucked it up. Still, Apple! Tut.

I’m off today so I need to maintain a level of productivity. “Don’t worry. Everything’s fine!”, I said, as Carter left the house. Ominous last words. I then cancelled my PlayStation Now subscription but bought GTA III, VICE and ANDREAS. whoops! It was only 13 quid. 

Right! Time to write a list.

Monday, 11th September, 2017.

19.21

Finally, back to normal life tomorrow. I’ll recap next time. This ends here.
What a weird couple of weeks.

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