Going Gonzo – when I Got There.

Saturday, 19th September 2020.


I had a birthday last week. I turned 48.

That’s all I have to say about that.

Louis’ scooter was nicked by some Egham scum on Thursday night, so I spent that time driving around threatening children.

Not my finest hour but very enjoyable.

Wednesday, 11th November 2020.


I’ve had no work for so long now, all my reserve money is gone. Typically, I have been offered an application for a flat.

The application is tough. I have sent over seventy different pieces if evidence to prove I am eligible but I am still waiting for an answer.

Friday, 13th November 2020.


I am currently waiting for some sort of email about this flat situation.

I do waiting. It’s what I do.


An hour later, I had payed a months rent and had a flat! It was that easy.

Slightly drunk and armed with a key safe code for some keys, me and Louis went and investigated.


I organised flooring. Big Dave is doing the carpets in the bedrooms and living room. I’m doing laminate in the hall, etc..

No worries.

I spent the rest of the day ordering the following:

  • Carpet
  • Cooker
  • TV
  • Fridge Freezer
  • Washing Machine
  • Mattress
  • Bed


I layed the laminate floor in the hall(s).

I feel like I’ve achieved. My legs and back are killing me.

I also managed to arrange broadband.

After a lot of thinking I opted for a ridiculously fast package.

Half a Gb a sec a full speed!



All my kitchen goods turned up today. No problem.

Then I received a call from the housing association, saying they had been informed I was fitting laminate flooring.

It is prohibited and has to be removed!

I have some time to replace it but throwing £300 down the drain didn’t make my day. I’ll have to have a think on it. I’ll get back to you on the outcome of that.

The ordered carpet also had to be cancelled. They can’t deliver it for 3 weeks!

Anyway, a lot of fucking around, later, I sorted it from a different location, Collected the three lengths and got it to the flat.

Luckily, an hour later Big Dave rung and said he had the underlay and could fit it now.

Skip forward a few hours.

I now have the three rooms carpeted so I can proceed with the giant, parents garage, excavation.

The location of my “stored” life.

Let’s see what that gets me!


I’m back at work now, so all flat moving has to happen in the evenings. Tonight’s plan is to collect my sofa, table and anything else I can fit in the van.

I also have an ottoman bed to build and connect my cooker.

That should be enough for today.


Yeah, I know there’s a gap. I was busy. It’s Saturday night and I’m sitting in my sofa, in my new lounge. I’ve ordered a Chinese for me and Louis. I’m unsure if the biggest physical influence is fatigue, alcohol or the fatties I’ve smoked but I’m pretty sure it’s the 18 hour, 7 day runaround I’ve been on.

All The Important Things!

I’m fucking shattered.


I went back to work today but still managed to spend 700 quid on a variety items including Louis’ bed, blinds, drawers and lampshades.

Then, I baked a ham.

The flat is definitely getting there, but progress is hampered by all these deliveries.

Trust me to achieve the goal during a fucking lock down!

Day ?

I’m almost done, for now. The rest will be “in progress”.

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