Going Gonzo – Lost Tools.

Thursday, 17th October 2019.


Sean’s lost his tools. What a cock! Luckily, it’s a little job and I have tools to spare.


Obviously, I brought it up every 5 minutes, all day long. I doubt he will lose them again.

Also, I just walked to the front carriage of the Reading train on Platform 24. Some prick broke the door so they cancelled the train. I can’t believe it costs me £16.90.

Trains and their staff are all massive cunts!


That’s fucking right!

I’m tarring all staff and the whole service with the same shitty brush.

Friday, 18th October 2019.


We are on a late start job today. Running a few lines in for Lego HQ at Chancery Lane. The money is better but it’s still a real pain in the arse.

There are real benefits to travelling into town at 6am.


I’m about a third of the way home on the Reading train. I’m fucking tired, in constant pain and full of hate.

A normal day for Mark you may think?

Well,..yeah. I suppose it is.

Working at Lego HQ is not as fun as it sounds.

1. You are not allowed to touch anything. There is Lego everywhere but if you touch it, some jumped up prick will, literally, scream, “DON’T FUCKING TOUCH THAT!”

2. I’ve spent a lot of time there over the years. Don’t be fooled by the toys.

They are greedy, angry bastards. You oonly have to spend a little while eavesdropping telephone conversations to realise this. You woul think they were in the arms trade from the way some of them talk on the phone.

This is better illustrated by what I can remember over hearing today.

“First, you have to gain access to the cae of opportunity, but once in the cave of opportunity, the real money can be made.

Don’t ask.

I have no idea.

All I can tell you is, the guy who was talking on the phone looked like a cross between Rees-Mogg and a slightly flattened slug. Topped off with red braces.

Don’t worry. We are all to blame. Anyone with kids has fed their sick lust for money at one time or another.

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