Going Gonzo – Help Is Definitely On It’s Way!

Saturday, 16th February 2019.



Sleep. What a fantastic mistress she is. I feel better for it and tonight I get to have a repeat performance. Only this time I’ll use Carter’s dirty pillows as…, well, pillows.

I’m not quite there yet though. I have to reconnect all my dads ageing TV boxes to his brand new 55″ Sony TV which no longer supports the cabling he has.

Go to Tesco and get some supplies for my limp-lung, boob pillow, woman.

And do it all with a level of style and wisdom only I possess.

A quick bottle of Heineken first.


I’m just waiting for a delivery cheeseburger that Carter bought me for doing her shopping. The whole affair was uneventful.

Big Tesco. Shopping. Bumped into my Brother. Yo Mikey! I convinced him to let me be caretaker of the full, original collection of Jam singles.

I bought fags, tobacco, Heineken, Doritos, dip and emergency ridged crisps.

Carter pulled a blinder by suggesting a dark horse comic adaptation currently on Netflix. The Umbrella Academy. The comic geeks have slated it but I’ve not read it so I’m untainted.

It’s definitely worth a punt.

Sunday, 17th February 2019.


I’m sitting on the end of my bed trying to decide the on best way not to waste the day.

I really need to do PC maintenance, website maintenance, life maintenance and a lot of other types of maintenance that aren’t worth listing.

It all seems pointless. I need a motivator but I can’t think what.


I had to start somewhere, so I started with the PC. I got my monitor back as Louis has had a screen upgrade( due to my dad’s upgrade).


Then my brother turned up. He had a car boot full of vinyl. Not just any vinyl.

Every Jam single bought on the week of release!

This is just what I’ve dragged out so far. There’s a lot of Motown singles, my Dead Kennedy’s albums, some Who, loads of Style Council and, well, loads….

This could end of as a big distraction.

Here’s a picture I haven’t seen in a while.

Good times. Fucking good times.


Mike was just telling me about when he saw The Jam during the “In The City” album release tour. They opened, like on the album, with Art School.

He then went on to tell me about seeing them at Wembley on the final tour.

It’s great having a cool older brother. Even at the age of 46. He will always be my cool big brother.

The only thing to rival it, is my big sister’s stories of seeing Bowie through various incantations or seeing Talking Heads.

You can read about these things but to hear it first hand, in a gonzo-esque manner, is the absolute.


“face front! you got the future. Shining like a piece of gold but, where as we get closer, it looks more like a lump of coal.”


I just found a couple of lines of coke.


My dad just asked my advice on why his outdoor light wasn’t working.


After half an hour of me running through the history of health and safety and the very changing regulations of electrical works he retreated to the lounge suggesting we look at it in the summer.


I came upstairs and did the other line.




That’s fucking that then.


I’m in bed. I gave up on everything and had a smoke. I’ve got the Cumberbatch, set in 1880ish, Sherlockepisode on. Louis is playing some strategy space game on my PC.

I managed to shave. Quality effort I thought.


It feels like the end and it’s only seven thirty. I suppose I should embrace it after the last few weeks. I just ate an old school sized bowl of coco pops. I feel like I should be watching an episode of Get Stuffed at 3am in Channel 4.

A couple of swigs of Maker’s should polish the scratches of the day off.

I’m hoping for redemption tomorrow.

If not it’s sniper rifle/clock tower time.

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