Going Gonzo – Crumpets

Sunday, 9th June 2019.


I’m waiting for Louis to get his are in gear so we can go to Iceland.

Not the Country. The shop.

Only the very best for me and mine!

It’s just for ready meals and stuff for the week whilst we are all busy. I say busy. Hopefully I’m busy. If not, it’ll be cracking on with the book. It’s got to that “it’s writing itself” stage. The only involvement from me is drawing Inspiration from music and twisted brain.


I did the shopping and confirmed that I’m laying in bed tomorrow,…..I mean writing tomorrow. I made roast beef in the afternoon.

“A whole street’s belief in Sunday’s roast beef.”

Sunday’s! Tut.

Monday, 10th June 2019.


Morning Bear!

He looks nice but don’t be fooled. If you Fall asleep, the very least you will be missing when you wake up is a couple of toes. He’s a gnawer.

Anyway, no work. I only woke up half an hour ago. Lazy motherfucker.

I’ve made a gigantic cup of coffee. I’ll see how well it motivates me.


Done some household chores. Drank more coffee. Wrote a few more paragraphs.

I got hungry so I’ve decided to go back to bed with 4 crumpets and the rest of the prosecco.


I’ve spent the last hour converting my other crap book into various e-book formats, re-watching Infinity War and having a little cry(Spiderman dying in Tony Stark’s arms is the worst one!)

It gets me worse than all the Tena lady nappy ads added together. Maybe it’s the prosecco?

Anyway, I’m gonna post the crap book on my site.


I ended up watching Endgame after that. So I had another little cry whilst Louis made me mini pizzas. After that, I had a Twister. Then I smoked a joint. After that, I started a cult.

Tuesday, 11th June 2019.


I disbanded the cult in the early hours of this morning. It all went a bit Jim Jones. I enjoyed the power and the constant demand from young followers to plant my seed in them, but it all went a bit weird when the Cool-Aid came out.

Anyway, I believed that the survivors all became florists. Which is nice.

I was expecting to see an ark outside after yesterdays biblical rain. Sadly, it didn’t rain as much as I thought. I would have been a shoe-in for animal counter.


I went to check the tumbledryer and found Louis still asleep. I had to ring and bullshit the school. In return he will be doing chores. The upside, I get to lay in bed.

I’ll have to do something though?


The boy did chores. I drank a beer.

Now I find myself watching Gosford Park. Why? Who knows. I’ve sent Louis off for a haircut. Bloody hippy.

Wednesday, 12th June 2019.


Not a lot happened after that. Carter came home and we watched murder. Endless, relentless murder.

Then I fell asleep.

I awoke this morning to a text from my boss. Obviously very excited about tomorrow’s job. Each to their own.

I was forced to get up as I had an overwhelming urge to listen to Rubberband man.

Which I did. Several times.


Carter has lent me her laptop. I can upgrade from the crap one. That pretty much writes the day off.

Let’s crack on shall we?

Go Easy.

Step Lightly.

Stay Free.

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